Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Goodbye, Beloved Friend.


Yesterday, on a rainy, cold Monday, I took Bentley for his last ride. We went to the vet, where he was given a shot that let him drift into an endless sleep.
Bentley had cancer, and not wanting to see him suffer, we chose to end his life. It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make.
I stayed with him in his final moments, stroking his head and whispering to him how much I loved him. He was my shadow for so long, that I can still sense him nearby.
The house feels emptier today. I miss him laying under the table in the family room, standing beside me waiting for a bit of my breakfast, lying at my feet while I sew. His presence is everywhere and no where.
My heart is broken in a place I did not know I had. It hurts terribly and I hope that one day I will be able to think about him without crying, or wishing I could bring him back.
I am taking comfort in the fact that he, a creature of his Heavenly Father, is in a special place with Him. I have always thought that pets, when they die, wait for their owners. I hope that is true, because I cannot imagine an eternity without his companionship. I wanted to stay in the room with him forever, not wanting to let go yet knowing that it had to be.
As I said goodbye, I left him with a kiss and a whisper, "Wait for me, okay?"
I know he will.


Anonymous said...

With tears streaming down my face, I know that I will one day feel your pain. My dear Gracie is nothing other than "my" Bentley. I am not sure what I will do or think when my day comes to say Goodbye to her. Please know that I am thinking of you dear friend. Wishing you peace, and your dear Bentley a peaceful rest.

Utah Grammie said...

Oh Karin, I am so very sorry! I do uderstand how you feel- Charlie our ShihTzu that got me through MY cancer made it through 2 operations with his and we were faced with the same decission as you were. I know your heart is breaking and mine is for you as well. I told myslef I would never let anything get to me that much again - but Charlie had different ideas. He led us to Braxton & Lulu - now I know he coaches them and is with us all, waiting and watching.
I do send yoou hugs and a shoulder to cry on- it's the hardest thing a petMom can go through. Yes, they will await our presence again and we'll be reuntied with our healthy, happy pups once again.

God bless you and Bently..
Love, Colleen, Braxton & Lulu

The Feathered Nest said...

Oh sweet Karin, I'm so, so very sorry for the loss of your precious Bentley. They are such wonderful members of our families, I wish I could give you a big ol' hug sweet friend, xxoo, Dawn

monix said...

My deepest sympathy. A dog becomes a family member in a way that no other pet can.

Betty said...

I am so very sorry to hear about Bentley. We have lost three of our rescues and I know your heart hurts so much. I found this poem several years ago; I love it because it gives me hope that we will see our precious little friends once more.

My best friend closed his eyes last night, As his head lay in my hand. The doctor said he was in pain, And it was hard for him to stand. The thoughts that scurried through my head, As I cradled him in my arms, Were of his younger years, And, oh his many charms. Today there was no gentle nudge, With an intense "I love you" gaze. Only a heart that's filled with tears, Remembering our joy-filled days. But an Angel just appeared to me, And said, "You should cry no more, God also loves our canine friends, He's installed a doggy door!" -Author Unknown

God bless.

Nan said...

Oh, Karin, I'm so, so sorry. All of us who love dogs, and who have lost them, know how you are feeling. I wish I lived closer.

white o'morn cottage said...

Hi, Karin, you don't know me but I know what you are going through tonight. I am thinking of you and your lovely Bently and sending you a long strong cyber hug from across the world.
Yes, you will be able to think and talk about him without tears...eventually. I can do it now and it only brings smiles and treasured memories. You will too.

I am also heading into that sad time again as my little Pretty has cancer too. Best wishes... from Pam

Amy Ellen said...

I am so sorry!! I will be praying for you.

Nan said...

Karin, just after reading your sad post, our daughter called in tears because one of her beloved Pugs was hit by a car. She and her boyfriend brought the little one over and Tom buried her in the pasture along with all our good dogs.

whimseycreations said...

Aw Karin I'm so sorry to hear about Bentley - I know you loved him so. Big hugs!

Cathy ~ Tadpoles and Teacups said...

What a poignant post, and I am so sorry for your loss.
We lost our dog last spring and we still miss her. They really do have a way of stealing a little piece of our hearts, don't they.

Blessings to you~


Here's the link if you're interested.

The City Farmgirl said...

My heart is heavy for you...