Monday, October 6, 2008

If It Waddles Like a Duck.....

then it must be a duck, right? Well, in this case, no, it isn't. This morning, as I was driving back from dropping John off at work, I spotted a young man walking down the sidewalk. He made me smile, only not in a happy way, more out of puzzlement.
His arms swayed from side to side in fluid movements and his legs were spread apart as far as they could be spread and still allow the young man to walk. Why? To hold his pants up, that's why.
Thank goodness I was in the school zone because it allowed me to drive slowly enough to watch him waddling down the sidewalk trying to look as cool as he possibly could to impress passers-by. I'm pretty sure he was hoping that one of the cars driving by would contain a young woman who would certainly be instantly infatuated by the sight of such a fine specimen.
The only problem with his plan was that it was failing miserably. As he walked his pants slid further down his behind and he had to resort to the tactic I refer to as "crotch-grasping." Instead of looking cool, he took on the appearance of a three year-old who, ten minutes ago thought that he might need to go potty, finds that he has waited too long and has to hold on for dear life so that he does not pee his pants. Okay, that made me smile in a rather "I-could-have-told-you-that-was-going-to-happen!" kind of way.
It is a mystery to me why boys would want to wear their pants in this manner at all. It is not attractive, they look ridiculous "hanging on" and it would seem to be a hazard for their well-being. How many have fallen on their faces because their pants have fallen off their bottoms?
I may start a campaign to eradicate low-slung pants and crotch-grasping. I think this will be my slogan, "Do you have to wee? No? Then pull up your pants and wear a belt!"
Do you think I will be successful?


Utah Grammie said...

Well that made me laugh too! I can just see him.."cool dude" HA! They will look back and think "What was I thinking??" I heard someone say, "Some rapper must have died - that buys pants are at half-mast!"

Pamela Terry and Edward said...

Isn't that current trend the funniest?? I know these fellows think they look "cool", but I mean if they only knew!!

Aunt Jenny said...

I hate that too!! I don't see it quiet as much here in small town Utah as I did in Calif..but still...and I hate seeing 12" of the top of their boxers hanging out over the top...just nasty. I am sure glad none of my own boys have thought it would be a cool look!!

Elizabeth G. said...


I use to comment on your other blog and then I lost the link when my computer went down. Dawn had a blog post about you the other day and I thought, "Isn't that the lady who had a blog with 'meandering' in it?"

I like your new blog.

By the way, I hate the whole pants-falling-off thing, too!


Amy Ellen said...

Too funny!! I hate that look as well, Who on earth ever thought hey this is a good idea???